Subject: Additional issues with draft-ietf-fax-service-v2-04.txt

From: [email-masked]
Date: Mon, 22 Oct 2001 12:20:29 -0700 (PDT)

I just reviewed the updated (-04) version of this document and it addresses the
issues I previously raised. Unfortunately, the changes themselves have raised a
couple of additional issues:

(1) This document now begins with a long summary, not a short abstract. The
    RFC Editor has started pushing back on documents that don't begin with
    a short abstract. I therefore suggest changing it to read:

Abstract

   This specification provides for "simple mode" carriage of facsimile
   data using Internet mail.  Extensions to this document will follow.
   The current specification employs standard protocols and file formats
   such as TCP/IP, Internet mail protocols [1, 2, 3], MIME [4, 10, 11],
   and TIFF for Facsimile [5, 12, 14].  It can send images not only to
   other Internet-aware facsimile devices but also to Internet-native
   systems, such as PCs with common email readers which can handle MIME
   mail and TIFF for Facsimile data.  The specification facilitates
   communication among existing facsimile devices, Internet mail agents,
   and the gateways which connect them.

   This document is a revision of RFC 2305. There have been no
   technical changes.

    The paragraphs on intellectual property claims and keyword terminology
    should each be moved to separate subsections after section 1, "Scope".
    Renaming section 1, "Scope" to "Introduction" would also be a good idea.

(2) The formatting of appendix parts 4 and 7 are busted and need to be fixed.
    Also "nomartive" should be "normative".

That's it!

				Ned

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From: Dave Crocker <[email-masked]>
Date: Mon, 22 Oct 2001 13:24:22 -0700

>     a short abstract. I therefore suggest changing it to read:

Ned,

I'm not one of the document's authors, but your suggested wording looks 
pretty good to me.

d/

----------
Dave Crocker  <mailto:[email-masked]>
Brandenburg InternetWorking  <http://www.brandenburg.com>
tel +1.408.246.8253;  fax +1.408.273.6464

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From: "Toyoda, Kiyoshi" <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 23 Oct 2001 19:26:17 +0900

Freed-san,

Your suggestion is right. I revised the draft according your suggestion.

RFC2305 Authors and Folks,
Please check the draft attached in this e-mail. If it has no problem,
I will submit it as Internet-Draft.

>    Also "nomartive" should be "normative".

Kiyoshi Toyoda

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From: [email-masked]
Date: Tue, 23 Oct 2001 08:29:27 -0700 (PDT)

> I will submit it as Internet-Draft.

I looked it over and it seems fine to me.

				Ned