Subject: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-hollenbeck-epp-rfc3733bis-04

From: <[email-masked]>
Date: Tue, 17 Oct 2006 14:44:23 +0300

I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART)
reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see
http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html).

Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments
you may receive.

Document: draft-hollenbeck-epp-rfc3733bis-04
Reviewer: Pasi Eronen
Review Date: 2006-10-17
IETF LC Date: 2006-10-12
IESG Telechat date: (not known yet)

Summary: This draft is basically ready for publication, but has nits
that should be fixed before publication.

Comments:

This is recycling RFC 3733 to Draft Standard, containing only very
minor changes. All the comments I have are quite minor and mostly
editorial in nature:

1) The document contains several references to UTF-8 like "names MAY
be provided in both UTF-8 [RFC3629] and a subset of UTF-8 that can be
represented in 7-bit ASCII depending on local needs."

This is not quite correct. UTF-8 is an encoding that converts Unicode
characters to octets. What the text probably means is that "names MAY
be provided in both Unicode and a subset of Unicode..."; how Unicode
is actually encoded depends on the XML declaration, and it's not
necessarily UTF-8.

2) To me E.164 looks like a normative reference, not merely 
informative.

3) Minor editorial nits:

- References: ISO 3166:1988 is a withdrawn standard; the correct 
  document is "Codes for the representation of names of countries 
  and their subdivisions -- Part 1: Country codes", ISO 3166-1:1997.
- References: E.164 (1991) is an extremely old version; the latest 
  approved version is E.164 (02/05).
- References: W3C.REC-xml-20040204 is not the latest version of this 
  spec; is this intentional, or should this be updated to 
  W3C.REC-xml-20060816?
- Appendix A: Section title should be "Changes from RFC 3733", not 3732
- Globally: "</epp&gt" -> "</eppgt>" (several instances)
- Section 5: "<xref target="RFC3339"/>" -> "[RFC3339]"

Best regards,
Pasi

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