Subject: [Gen-art] gen-art review of draft-ietf-mboned-routingarch-09.txt

From: Scott Brim <[email-masked]>
Date: Thu, 13 Sep 2007 09:54:53 -0400

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for draft-FOOBAR.txt.

For background on Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at
<http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html>.

Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments
you may receive.

Summary: This draft is basically ready for publication, but has nits
that should be fixed before publication.

Review: 

This is very good.  Disregarding a few non-technical concerns about
presentation, I only have a couple of technical nits that the RFC
editor might not catch.  Since they are small I'm only sending this to
gen-art, author and AD.

2.1.1:

  Change "PIM-SSM" to "PIM-SM".

2.1.4:

  "Distance Vector Multicast Routing Protocol (DVMRP) [RFC1075]
  [I-D.ietf-idmr-dvmrp-v3] [I-D.ietf-idmr-dvmrp-v3-as] was the first
  protocol designed for multicasting, and to get around initial
  deployment hurdles.  It also included tunneling capabilities which
  were part of its multicast topology functions."

    Is this supposed to be one sentence?  If not, I don't understand
    the end of the first sentence.

That's it ... Scott

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From: Pekka Savola <[email-masked]>
Date: Thu, 13 Sep 2007 18:10:47 +0300 (EEST)

> that should be fixed before publication.

Thanks Scott,

>  Change "PIM-SSM" to "PIM-SM".

Not sure if I understand this comment.  I guess you're referring to 
"xxx; PIM-SSM is a subset of PIM-SM." but I don't understand why SSM 
should be changed to SM.  Yep, it's sometimes confusing that people 
use the term PIM-SSM to refer to the part of PIM-SM spec that's needed 
if you did only SSM, but I guess it can't be helped.

>    the end of the first sentence.

Oops, thanks for catching this.  I think the last part of the sentence 
was intended to be the part of the next one but in editing it got 
inserted after the wrong line.

The text in my working copy now reads:

"... was the first protocol designed for multicasting. To get around 
initial deployment hurdles, it also included tunneling capabilities 
which were part of its multicast topology functions."

-- 
Pekka Savola                 "You each name yourselves king, yet the
Netcore Oy                    kingdom bleeds."
Systems. Networks. Security. -- George R.R. Martin: A Clash of Kings

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From: Scott Brim <[email-masked]>
Date: Thu, 13 Sep 2007 12:26:13 -0400

> if you did only SSM, but I guess it can't be helped.

That's my fault for reading too fast.  Pretend it never happened. :-)