Subject: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-mboned-rfc3171bis-07.txt

From: "Miguel A. Garcia" <[email-masked]>
Date: Mon, 19 Oct 2009 09:14:54 +0200

I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART)
reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see
http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html).

Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments
you may receive.

Document: draft-ietf-mboned-rfc3171bis-07.txt
Reviewer: Miguel Garcia <[email-masked]>
Review Date: 19-October-2009
IETF LC End Date: 28-October-2009

Summary: The document is almost ready to be published as a BCP.

Major issues: none

Minor issues:

- Due to the nature of the draft, I think it makes sense to promote RFC 
5226 to a normative reference.

Nits/editorial comments:

- In the cover page, the document says it obsoletes RFC 3171 and RFC 3138 
(if approved). I am missing a line indicating that the document updates 
RFC 2780. While this fact is reflected in Section 1, it is not reflected 
in the cover page.

- Expand terms at the first occurrence. This includes:
   Section 1: SDP, SAP, GLOP, SSM
   Section 8: VMTP
   Section 9: ASN
   Section 9.2: RIR, AS, eGLOP

   In relation to this, Section 9.2 contains two similar abbreviations: 
eGLOP and EGLOP. Those are probably the same and should be unified.

- The document uses quite a few references to URLs. The RFC Editor does 
not like this approach because URLs often change with time. So, I would 
suggest to refer to the title of the web page instead. It might be 
possible that the RFC Editor accepts the addition of a reference to a URL 
(which should be valid for some time), but the main link should be done 
to the content, not to the URL. This includes:

   Section 1: http://www.iana.org/numbers.html
   This page is already obsolete, and the URL redirects to 
http://www.iana.org/protocols/
   I suggest to refer to the "IANA Protocol Registries [IANA-protocols]", 
and the link is in the reference [IANA-protocols].

   Section 11: http://www.iana.org/protocols/apply
   I suggest to refer to the "IANA Protocol Registration Forms 
[IANA-registration]", moving the link to the [IANA-registration] reference.

- There is no reference to [SDR], used in Section 7.

- Reference to RFC 1190 is obsolete. RFC 1819 should be used instead.

- Reference to RFC 2030 is obsolete. RFC 4330 should be used instead.

/Miguel
-- 
Miguel A. Garcia
+34-91-339-3608
Ericsson Spain