Subject: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-kanno-tls-camellia-00

From: "Miguel A. Garcia" <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 9 Mar 2011 09:52:08 +0100

I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART)
reviewer for this draft. For background on Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at 
<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>

Please resolve these comments along with any other comments you may receive.

Document: draft-kanno-tls-camellia-00.txt
Reviewer: Miguel Garcia <[email-masked]>
Review Date: 2011-03-09
IETF LC End Date: 2011-03-23
IESG Telechat: 2011-04-14

Summary: The document is ready for publication as an informational RFC.

Major issues: none

Minor issues: none

Nits:

- It would be nice if the draft includes formal references to external 
document where appropriate. Let me provide a few examples where I believe 
those formal references are missing:

   + Section 1, Introduction, missing reference to the SHA-2 family. 
Probably the reference should be done towards NIST FIPS 180-3:

    The proposed
    cipher suites include variants using SHA-2 family of cryptographic
    hash functions and Galois counter mode (GCM) [11].

   + Section 3.2, add reference to AES (FIPS 197) at the beginning of:

    AES authenticated encryption with additional data algorithms,
    AEAD_AES_128_GCM and AEAD_AES_256_GCM are described in RFC5116 [5].

    + Section 3.3, add a reference TLS 1.2 (RFC 5246).

    The hash algorithms and PRF algorithms for TLS 1.2 SHALL be as
    follows:

    + Section 3.3, add a reference to HMAC-SHA-256/384, most likely RFC 
2104. Also to SHA-356/384 (NIST FIPS 180-3=:

     a) The cipher suites ending with _SHA256 use HMAC-SHA-256 as the MAC
    algorithm, The PRF is the TLS PRF [6] with SHA-256 as the hash
    function,
    b) The cipher suites ending with _SHA384 use HMAC-SHA-384 as the MAC
    algorithm, The PRF is the TLS PRF [6] with SHA-384 as the hash
    function.

   + Section 3.3, add a reference to TLS versions prior to 1.2, for 
example RFC 2246, and RFC 4346:

    When used with TLS versions prior to 1.2, the PRF is calculated as
    specified in the appropriate version of the TLS specification.

- Expand terms at first occurrence. This includes: AES, PRF

- Introduction, the last sentence is already repeated and does not add 
any value. It can be safely deleted:

  The Camellia algorithm and its properties are described in [2].

      Miguel G.
-- 
Miguel A. Garcia
+34-91-339-3608
Ericsson Spain