Subject: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-core-http-mapping-13.txt

From: Francis Dupont <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 31 Aug 2016 14:41:13 +0200

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-core-http-mapping-13.txt
Reviewer: Francis Dupont
Review Date: 20160829
IETF LC End Date: 20160822
IESG Telechat date: unknown

Summary: Ready

Major issues: None

Minor issues: None

Nits/editorial comments:
 - Abstract page 1: please expand the CoAP abbrev at first use.

 - ToC page 3 and 11 page 29: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments

 - 1 page 3: again please expand the CoAP abbrev at first use.

 - 3 page 6, 5.4.2 page 12, 5.5 page 13, and 7 note 4 page 22:
  i.e. -> i.e.,

 - 5.3 page 9 (twice), 5.4.2 page 12, 6.2 page 16, 6.2 page 17 (3 times),
   6.6 Fig 2 page 19, 7 note 7 page 22, 8.3 page 24, and 10.2 page 28:
  e.g. -> e.g.,

 - 5.4.1.1 page 10: IMHO the 1. Target CoAP URI ... should be on the
  next page (BTW leave this to the RFC Editor).

 - 5.4.2.1 page 12: same comment about "2. Target CoAP URI ..."

 - 5.4.2.1 page 13: perhaps a missing "on" at the end of:
  http://p.example.com/hc/?s=coap&hp=s.example.com&p=/light&q=

Regards

[email-masked]

---

From: "Fossati, Thomas (Nokia - GB)" <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 31 Aug 2016 13:39:16 +0000

Hi Francis,

Thanks very much for your review time.

> - Abstract page 1: please expand the CoAP abbrev at first use.

OK

> - ToC page 3 and 11 page 29: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments

OK

> - 1 page 3: again please expand the CoAP abbrev at first use.

OK

> - 3 page 6, 5.4.2 page 12, 5.5 page 13, and 7 note 4 page 22:

OK

>   6.6 Fig 2 page 19, 7 note 7 page 22, 8.3 page 24, and 10.2 page 28:

OK

> - 5.4.2.1 page 12: same comment about "2. Target CoAP URI ..."

As you say, this is something to be left as a note to the RFC editor.

>  http://p.example.com/hc/?s=coap&hp=s.example.com&p=/light&q=

No, this example is meant to show that if the Target CoAP URI has no query
component then the template produces an explicit "q" with no value.

Cheers, thanks,
t