Subject: [Idr] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-idr-bgp-prefix-sid-10

From: Peter Yee <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 31 Jan 2018 11:44:01 -0800

Reviewer: Peter Yee
Review result: Ready with Nits

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-idr-bgp-prefix-sid-10
Reviewer: Peter Yee
Review Date: 2018-01-31
IETF LC End Date: 2018-01-26
IESG Telechat date: 2018-02-08

Summary: This draft specifies an optional BGP attribute for use with Segment
Routing.  It's well written and reable, although I make no claims to being an
expert in this area.  The draft is ready for publication but has some nits that
should be fixed (really nothing major).

Major issues:

Minor issues:

Nits/editorial comments:

General:

Change "extendibility" to "extensibility" throughout the document.

Change "First Come, First Served" (with varying hyphenation) to simply
"first-come, first-served" in a few places.  Meaning making it lower case and
hyphenate consistently.

Specific.

Page 3, Section 1, 1st paragraph, 2nd sentence: change the colon to a comma.

Page 3, Section 1, 3rd paragraph, 1st sentence: append comma after the close
parenthesis, "label", and "Dataplane".

Page 4, Section 1, 4th paragraph, 1st sentence: delete the comma.

Page 4, Section 1, 4th paragraph, last sentence: consider making "Segment"
lower case for consistency with previous usage.

Page 4, Section 2.1, 2nd indented paragraph, 2nd sentence: change "to use" to
"using".

Page 7, Section 3.2, 1st paragraph, 2nd sentence: should the uses of "will be"
throughout the document be changed to "MUST"?

Page 8, 2nd bullet item (Length): insert "a" before "multiple".

Page 9, Section 4, 1st sentence: delete the comma.

Page 9, Section 4.1, 3rd paragraph, 1st sentence: delete "as".

Page 10, Section 4.2, 1st paragraph, 2nd sentence: delete the first "the".

Page 12, 1st paragraph, 2nd sentence: change "Similarily" to "Similarly".

Page 12, Section 7, 1st paragraph, 2nd sentence: insert "to" before the first
"the".

---

From: "Acee Lindem (acee)" <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 31 Jan 2018 23:02:06 +0000

Hi Peter, 

Thanks for the review, please see inline.

On 1/31/18, 2:44 PM, "Peter Yee" <[email-masked]> wrote:

    Reviewer: Peter Yee

    

    
    Major issues:
    
    Minor issues:
    
    Nits/editorial comments:
    
    General:

No - see https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/extendibility

I've made this consistent with IANA terminology.

    Specific.

Fixed.

Fixed.

I'm not sure exactly which comma you are referring to but I believe the punctuation is correct before "reducing". 

Fixed.

Changed 

I've consistently used MUST throughout. 

I've put it in parenthesis. 

Fixed.

Reworded.

Fixed.

Fixed.

Fixed. 

Thanks,
Acee