Subject: [Last-Call] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-capport-architecture-08

From: Joel Halpern via Datatracker <[email-masked]>
Date: Sat, 16 May 2020 15:35:56 -0700

Reviewer: Joel Halpern
Review result: Almost Ready

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-capport-architecture-08
Reviewer: Joel Halpern
Review Date: 2020-05-16
IETF LC End Date: 2020-05-25
IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat

Summary: This document is almost ready for publication as an Informational RFC

Major issues:
    This document says it is Informational.  It says it describes "a" capport
    architecture.  But the third paragraph of the introduction says that this
    document standardizes an architecture.  The rest of this review assumes
    that is an error, and this is describing "an" architecture, rather than
    "the IETF" architecture.

Minor issues:
    The abstract really should expand "capport".   As simple as having the
    first sentence read "This document describes a "captive portal" (capport)
    archtiecture."

Nits/editorial comments:
    Following the first bulleted list in the introduction, the document reads:
    "this document does not yet describe...?  The word "yet" seems
    inappropriate.  We are pbulsihgin this as an RFC.  Please remove the "yet".