Subject: [Mipshop] I-D Action:draft-ietf-mipshop-fmipv6-rfc4068bis-07.txt (more editorial comments)

From: David Cypher <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 23 Apr 2008 12:28:36 -0400

Section 5.4, page 18, second paragraph; streamig is missing an "n" 
for streaming.
Current
    Whereas buffering can enable a smooth handover, the buffer size and
    the rate at which buffered packets are eventually forwarded are
    important considerations when providing buffering support.  For
    instance, an application such as Voice over IP typically needs
    smaller buffers compared to high-resolution streamig video, which has
Corrected
    Whereas buffering can enable a smooth handover, the buffer size and
    the rate at which buffered packets are eventually forwarded are
    important considerations when providing buffering support.  For
    instance, an application such as Voice over IP typically needs
    smaller buffers compared to high-resolution streaming video, which has

Section 5.6, page 19, third paragraph; up on is one word, upon.
Current
    An MN returning to the PAR before updating the necessary bindings
    when present on the NAR MUST send a Fast Binding Update with the Home
    Address equal to the MN's PCoA and a lifetime of zero to the PAR.
    The MN should have a security association with the PAR since it
    performed a fast handover to the NAR.  The PAR,up on receiving this
Corrected
    An MN returning to the PAR before updating the necessary bindings
    when present on the NAR MUST send a Fast Binding Update with the Home
    Address equal to the MN's PCoA and a lifetime of zero to the PAR.
    The MN should have a security association with the PAR since it
    performed a fast handover to the NAR.  The PAR, upon receiving this

Section 5.6, page 20, first paragraph; atmost is not a word. Suggest "at most"
Current
    Temporary tunnels for the purposes of fast handovers should use short
    lifetimes (of the order of atmost few tens of seconds or less).  The
    lifetime of such tunnels should be enough to allow a MN to update all
    its active bindings.  The default lifetime of the tunnel should be
    the same as the lifetime value in the FBU message.
Corrected
    Temporary tunnels for the purposes of fast handovers should use short
    lifetimes (of the order of at most few tens of seconds or less).  The
    lifetime of such tunnels should be enough to allow a MN to update all
    its active bindings.  The default lifetime of the tunnel should be
    the same as the lifetime value in the FBU message.

RFC 2463 is referenced, yet RFC 4443 obsoletes it.  Why is this 
document using an obsolete RFC?

RFC 2461 is referenced, yet RFC 4861 obsoletes  it.  Why is this 
document using an obsolete RFC?

David Cypher

_______________________________________________
Mipshop mailing list
[email-masked]
https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/mipshop

---

From: "Koodli, Rajeev" <[email-masked]>
Date: Thu, 24 Apr 2008 13:35:41 -0400

Hi David,

Thanks for catching these. I will make a note of it. Usually, the RFC
Editor will also catch them and suggest revisions. I will incorporate
them during the RFC edit process. 

Thanks,

-Rajeev

> -----Original Message-----
> From: [email-masked] [mailto:[email-masked]] On
Behalf
> Of David Cypher
> Sent: Wednesday, April 23, 2008 9:29 AM
> To: [email-masked]
> Subject: [Mipshop] I-D
Action:draft-ietf-mipshop-fmipv6-rfc4068bis-07.txt
> (more editorial comments)
> 
> Section 5.6, page 20, first paragraph; atmost is not a word. Suggest
"at
> most"